"Every girl should have pearls."
My grandma said this as she handed me a small box one day. I opened the box and saw my very own pearl necklace. I had borrowed my grandmother's numerous times, and now I had my own. I was never a big fan of jewelry, but I always did enjoy her pearl necklace. I did mention that I wished it was a little shorter, so of course, mine was short and didn't hang as much as her pearl necklace. I was grateful, and though it may have seemed old fashioned, I even wore it to my senior prom.
Pearls have held significance for me personally, I guess. Along with the whole pearl necklace from my grandma, my great-grandmother's middle name was Pearl. Pearls are my birthstone. The girls in chorale in high school got to wear pearls at their performance, and every year, I tried out for chorale and was always picked as an alternate, but finally got in my senior year. It was a joy to have be able to finally walk off stage from my women's chorus performance to put on a set of pearls and return to the stage. For me, it has symbolized who I am. It has meant triumph. It has meant family: specifically my grandmother.
Being a teenager raised by your grandma can be difficult at times, but it never stopped me from getting advice from her. I was always asking advice on school, love, religion, how to treat others, etc. My grandmother time and time again would point me to a poem, and today this poem was read at her funeral.
Grandma's Pearls of Wisdom
I traveled paths you've yet to walk
Learned lessons old and new
And now this wisdom of my life
I'm blessed to share with you
Let kindness spread like sunshine
Embrace those who are sad
Respect their dignity, give them joy
And leave them feeling glad
Forgive those who might hurt you
And though you have your pride
Listen closely to their viewpoints
Try to see the other side
Walk softly when you're angry
Try not to take offense
Invoke your sense of humor
Laugher's power is immense
Express what you are feeling
Your beliefs you should uphold
Don't shy away from what is right
Be courageous and be bold
Keep hope right in your pocket
It will guide you day by day
Take it out when is needed
When its near, you'll find a way
Remember friends and family
Of which you are a precious part
Love deeply and love truly
Give freely from your heart
This world is far from perfect
There's conflict and there's strife
But you still can make a difference
By how you live your life
And so I'm very blessed to know
The wonders you will do
Because you are my granddaughter*
And I believe in you
I think it is funny that it is called "Grandma's Pearls of Wisdom" considering everything I have just written.
I'm not sure if you know how a pearl is made, but it is quite interesting to me. It starts out when something slips into the oyster and begins to irritate/hurt it. In order to protect itself, the oyster covers the irritating substance with layers of what the oyster uses to create its shell. This irritating substance becomes a pearl. What once caused pain creates something beautiful.
This isn't the first time I have lost someone close to me that I loved. I have lost my mother, my grandfather, and now my grandmother. Each loss has been so painful. It has been hard to lose each parental figure in my life before I even reached the age of 23. However, I know that I can turn this pain into something beautiful. It is what my mom, grandpa, and grandma would have wanted. I can look back and smile at the many memories I created with them. I can look back at the wisdom they imparted to me, particularly my grandmother.
Grandma, I hope you are enjoying dancing with grandpa again. Just know I'm going to cut in someday.
On another note, let's make sure we can find me a wedding dress that goes with these.
*=for grandma's funeral, "granddaughter" was changed to "family"
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